who run the world? (freakishly pretty) girls \

Are they real human beings? Did they enter the world through someone’s va-jay-jay? Do their faces scrunch up all tight when they take really big shits?

Here’s where it get’s really tricky. Everyone knows that people are only friends with other people that are approximately as hot as they are. But freakishly pretty girls are a rarity. There’s no way there is anywhere near enough of them to only be friends with each other...so how does that work? I guess they are just forced to hang out with normal pretty girls, who in any other circumstance would be considered hot but who, when put side by side with the freakishly pretty girl, suddenly seem like frumpy side-kicks with cankles. And, well, FUCK THAT.

But they can’t even stop hanging out with the really freakishly pretty girl if they wanted to because there’s something about freakishly pretty girls where they’re just so violently pretty that they have this creepy power over everyone in the world where like, you just have to do whatever they tell you cuz they’re fuqqin scary as shit and will eat you if you don’t (but probz will never shit you out cuz, do they even shit? Genuinely not sure.) So instead you convince yourself that if you go out with them, maybe more really hot guys will talk to you because they’ll be drawn in by her beauty but then they’ll totz realize how much cooler and funnier and mentally stable-r you are than her once they start talking to you guys.

But the reality is that they will all only give a shit about her. 100% guarantee. Even though the only positive thing you can say about this girl is that she’s, like, the prettiest person you’ve ever seen in your life. It doesn’t matter that she isn’t cool, or funny, or nice, or that she eats fuqqin baby brains for meals. Because she is freakishly pretty and that is all that matters in life.

xo

#Bachelor #pretty #beautiful #bitches #zoolander